Probably Not the Worst Mom in the World

I'm ashamed of only a small handful of things I've done (or accidentally allowed to happen) to my son.   I'm probably not the worst mom in the world, but I figured I'd share some of my worst blunders, you know, just in case you had the same idea.

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When my son came home from the hospital, he was still a bit yellowy, so his pediatrician from the NICU said to let him get some sun.  It was warm enough outside and the sun was shining.  So we got some sun.  He was eight days old.  And I stayed outside with him for an hour.  Without sunscreen.  It didn't even occur to me, but I did think ahead and cover his eyes with his sock. 

 

Not burned, but slightly pink enough that I was too ashamed for anyone to see you for a day or two.

 

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My son was forced to wear this awful outfit and sit like this because I thought it made him look like a cartoon baby:



 



 

This is probably the worst color on you, son.  Mommy's sorry.

 

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He needed a moustache for Halloween, so I made one with my waterproof mascara. 

 

 

You were the sweetest Brawny Man, but I'm sorry I had to scrub you with makeup remover. 

 

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I had never left my baby alone with our dog Max until this day.  Max appeared to be growing incredibly fond of the baby, so it seemed natural to let Max sit beside his new human best friend without me scolding him for doing so.  I turned my back and took one step away from the baby when my little boy shrieked like I had never heard before.  Max had grown fond of my boy indeed.  The dog was, well, the dog was trying to be intimate with my son's head.  Horrified, I removed the dog and comforted my son.  I'm sure it startled the baby because it was so quick.  Here they are, shortly after, with Max acting appropriately:

 

Max has done it to all of us.  Now you're part of the family.